New York City psychologist rips traveler: ‘Putting the needs of another woman before his own wife is a no-no’
“So my wife and I recently went on a trip together,” a man shared on Reddit not long ago.
The trip was paid for by his wife’s father, the man said — “he flew us to Hawaii with first-class seats. We had a great time.”
The man, calling himself “TaxRightOffer,” also said he was “less experienced with plane travel” than his wife and that “this was the first time I flew first class.”
It was on their trip back home that things became dicey.
The man (who did not share where he’s based) said the couple were seated “near the back” of the plane on the flight home — and that “a mother and her baby were , and the poor baby was not having a good time.”
The man said, “I felt even worse [for] the mother, as I [knew] she was probably equally distressed about the baby crying.”
The man related that he felt sympathy for the young mother and the child — but “my wife was mad,” he wrote.
“She kept making comments about how our flight was going to be miserable … Her [complaining] went on for the longest time. She kept saying that the mother was irresponsible and if she [didn’t] know how to calm her baby, she shouldn’t be taking it on a plane.”
“I tried to tell her to calm down, as it’s not that serious — but she wasn’t having it.”
The man added, “I tried to tell her to calm down, as it’s not that serious — but she wasn’t having it.”
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The man shared that “eventually I got tired of that, so I offered to go speak to the mom for my wife. She said she would be happy if I did.”
The man revealed what happened next — something that more than 8,000 people reacted to, with some 3,500 people offering comments.
“I went … and told the mother that if she wanted, I would give her my first-class seat so she [could] kick her feet up and that [it might] be more comfortable for her and the baby.”
The man said that initially, the mother didn’t want to — “but I insisted, and her husband encouraged her to take it.”
“I got a series of angry texts from my wife.”
So the mother then accepted the man’s offer — and “took her baby up to first class and I [then] got a series of angry texts from my wife.”
The man shared with others, “I felt like this was not a huge deal as my wife brought noise-canceling headphones” with her on the flight.
“And the other people in first class most likely did as well,” he wrote.
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He added that if they didn’t have that type of headphones, then “they [had] normal headphones and [could] simply block out the baby. It’s 2023 — not 1990,” he went on. “We’re not living in the Stone Age.”
All told, the man said, “the baby cried for maybe 30 minutes on an 8-hour flight. So barely at all.”
The problem was far from solved, however.
“When my wife and I met up, she was livid,” he wrote. “She told me that I ruined her flight and ruined the end of the trip for her.”
He finished his post on Reddit with these words: “I told her that she’s overreacting to something that’s only mildly annoying. She has refused to drop this.”
“If you have something that’s bothering you, then you should talk about it and resolve it right away.”
And he asked others if he was an “a–hole” for “giving a mother with a crying baby my seat near my wife to teach her a lesson?”
Fox News Digital reached out to a psychologist for comment on the issue.
Said Dr. Jayme Albin, PhD, a clinical psychologist in New York City, “This man made a huge mistake in his marriage and better get his priorities straight if he wants to stay married.”
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She added, “Putting the needs of another woman before his own wife is a big no-no, especially when your wife is distressed. He completely discounted his wife’s feelings and her need for connection and feeling important and protected by him — and instead opted to dote on and accommodate the needs of another woman.”
Dr. Albin also noted, “As a general rule in relationships, it’s OK to give outside [help] to others, but only as long as it doesn’t hurt your nuclear core.”
She pointed out, “He needs to work on his boundaries and pay attention to who and what is a priority to him. And apologize to his wife.”
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Plenty of folks on Reddit, meanwhile, shared their views and opinions.
Wrote one person, “If you have something that’s bothering you, then you should talk about it and resolve it right away. There’s no need for this passive kind of behavior.”
Someone else was even blunter.
“Why isn’t a woman allowed to complain to a husband about a crying baby? … She didn’t confront the woman [or] make loud comments so the woman could hear. She didn’t make a scene. She [moaned] to her spouse.”
“Why are you married to someone you obviously don’t like?”
Instead, this person went on, “you decided to punish your wife. You were on a free trip paid for by her father — and decided you needed to be [petty about it]. I wouldn’t invite you on the next trip.”
Another commenter wrote, “Why are you married to someone you obviously don’t like?”
Plenty of others who responded noted how annoying it is to have to hear crying children on flights.
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But a self-described “childless” person took a different tack: “I don’t understand the obsessive hatred people have with crying babies on planes. You should go into a flight prepared knowing that there will probably be babies, snoring people, smelly people, people who accidentally touch you and other little annoyances.”
However, this commenter added, “What’s more annoying than a crying baby is the grown adult complaining non-stop about the crying baby, which is what it sounds like your wife was doing. You can’t control other people. Only how you respond to them.”
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The commenter finished with, “You’re already paying for your trip” — or at least part of it.
So, the person, said, “spend a little bit more for some headphones and some classical music and just relax.”